I’m Back!

I’d like to wish everyone who has stopped by here and Twitter, Twitter@tamavista.com, a wonderful 2011.

Many of you have requested that I update this blog. It’s been a long time and I have no excuses. While I’ve had plenty to share, business and personal commitments took more time than expected. I do promise to update more.

I also promise to get my website up and running very soon. Many of you have asked me to make my hypnotherapy and life coaching skills services available. While my time is full raising a teenager and running a small but rewarding business, Twitter opened a new world of friends who’ve gently nudged me to expand my reach.

I got started in this career by using these same techniques to help myself. What worked for me, I know can work for many of you.

Since we all share the same dreams and challenges, the solutions are also universal-to a point. There are a few of you that need more than I can offer.  I will never take on a client that I cannot help. I will refer you to the right resources though.

Many of my Twitter friends have asked me to sum up my personal philosophy. It is very simple.

” All of us can change. Change takes courage. All of us have enough courage.”

That’s it. Nothing new or special, but within that philosophy is a whole universe of wonderful possibilities.

Oh, and my most important values are: Kindness, compassion, courage, empathy, gratitude and generosity.

I’ll be adding more Posts in the coming weeks. If you have any issues you’d like me to discuss. Feel free to let me know.

 

Butch

January 4, 2011 at 2:46 am Leave a comment

Hypnosis-can it cure crazy?

Most of you smart folks noticed that the title is a loaded question. The answer  depends on how you define “crazy” and “cure”.  Certainly you’re going to need a qualified medical professional for serious mental diseases such as schizophrenia. Here we’re really talking about the other kind of crazy.  Such as common phobias and neurotic behaviors.

We’ve all said “so and so” is crazy, when in reality they are just phobic or neurotic about something.  It could be fear of driving, open spaces or speaking in public. Or it could be constant hand washing, nail biting or stuttering. These are the kind of conditions  that hypnosis is perfect for treating.

So with that disclaimer out of the way, can hypnosis cure crazy? The answer is, yes it can!  And as you’ve probably figured out, all of these conditions are habits and learned behaviors. And there is overwhelming evidence  that even the hard wiring of the brain isn’t all that hard after all. For example, stroke victims that regain use of limbs, speech and other functions are clearly benefiting from the spontaneous rewiring of the brain.

All learned behaviors are the manifestation the brain re-wiring itself, creating new neural connections. What this means for personality disorders, destructive habits and dangerous behaviors is amazing.  Through the power of the mind, we can rewire the brain to create positive behaviors.

It would be nice to help children with hypnosis rather than feed them powerful psychotropic drugs, which in many cases creates conditions far worse than what they were originally treated for. How many so called ADHD kids really need all those dangerous drugs?

The list of conditions successfully treated with hypnosis is huge and it’s getting bigger every year as we learn more and more about the incredible resilience and power of the mind.  Hypnotherapy vs Prozac-which would you rather be addicted to?

For now if you’re suffering from the kind of crazy that afflicts all of us from time to time, try hypnosis. You will be amazed. But don’t overlook the power of hypnosis to help even deeper problems. Since I am not an MD, I can’t and won’t say more. Just do the research for yourself.

If you want to learn more or need  help feel free to contact me.

June 13, 2009 at 7:32 pm 1 comment

Aging parents, 3 steps to coping

I’ve been away for awhile taking care of an ailing father and both in-laws. I am going to share some some important suggestions to help you cope during this trying time.

I’ll be honest, after more than 20 years of helping others overcome  stress and adversity, I found myself occasionally forgetting my own advice. But I got back on track. So if you feel overwhelmed right now, there is help.

Taking care of our aging parents is one of the most challenging and stressful events in life. It is gut wrenching to see your parents become frail and helpless. They took care of us. We depended on them for everything and now the roles are reversed.  I am going through it as I write this. For the last 12 months both of my in-laws have been in and out of emergency rooms and now both need 24 hour care.

You may now find yourself dealing with multiple doctors, hospitals, insurance companies, medicare, powers of attorney, home nursing, medications, learning new medical terminology etc.  On top of helping your parents, you have to take care of yourself and your immediate family. Your children also worry about their grandparents and you struggle with what and how much to tell them. For all of you going through this, I am with you.

Since every situation is unique, I cannot cover all of them. The type of illness, where your parents live, the financial situation and whether you have siblings will all play a role in how you will take care of your parents. Even your culture and background will influence your choices. For example, some cultures and families disapprove of nursing homes. While others believe nursing homes are the best option. Whatever decision you make it will be difficult, both have their own challenges. I’ll write more in another article about nursing homes vs staying at home. There is too much too cover here.

In an earlier article I wrote about my father’s aggressive form of Alzheimer’s which stuck him last year. He is now in a special care home. After months of trying to keep him at home, we could no longer provide him the help he needed.

Your parents may be suffering from terminal illness or just gradually losing their health and independence. Some of you may be preparing for the inevitable end. And some of you may be alone and have to take care of your parents by yourself.

For those of you who had a difficult relationship with your parents, this is especially a hard time for you.  Do you feel guilty over not caring enough? Do you feel compelled to make amends before it’s too late? Or perhaps  life was so tough with your parents that your love is deeply buried or gone, but you are the only able to take care of them. All of these scenarios are more common than you probably realize. You are not alone

And all of these situations are emotionally and physically wrenching. But there are steps you can take to minimize the stress and get help. But I won’t fool you. Nothing will or should completely eliminate the pain you are going through. Some emotional pain and stress is normal and you can’t cure normal.

I want to share with you the hard earned techniques I used. These are simple techniques. So simple and obvious that we frequently forget them as I did. Please use them. I cannot stress enough how important they are.

1) Take time for yourself and your immediate family. Exercise, eat healthy, get enough sleep.  You won’t be helpful to your parents or own family if your own health suffers. It’s not necessary to spend every moment with your parents, but it is vital that you set aside at least one hour per day for yourself. Use it to rest, catch up with your kids and spouse. It is also vital that you make a schedule to help your parents. Unless there is an emergency, stick to it and don’t feel guilty if you’re not with them all the time.

2) Seek help from friends, family and professional resources. It’s likely some of your friends have gone through the same thing. Ask them how they coped and what they did to help their parents. I did and learned valuable information on such things as nursing homes, medicare, how to deal with insurance companies, doctors and hospitals.  They also know you feel and what you’re going through. This itself is a huge help.

Ask your family for help and cooperation. Not all of you have this advantage, but for those of you with siblings and close relatives, this step is very important. Put aside any differences and focus on the common goal of getting your parents the best help available. Make a list of tasks, resources and available time and divide the work.  I worked closely with my sister, and while we didn’t always agree, together we got things done. We also had each other for emotional support. It was a blessing.

Most hospitals, insurance companies and local communities offer support programs for people just like you.  Many of these services are free-use them. You can talk to trained counselors and obtain free legal and medical advice. If you belong to a church, ask them about any services they offer. Don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed.  What you’re going through is a normal part of life. Be strong and seek help. Trust me on this, doing everything on your own is very, very tough.  It was a profound lesson to be reminded that most people are compassionate and helpful and that all of us need help from time to time.

3) Find God, meditate, become spiritual. This is the most important step. If you’re not religious or spiritual, then please learn and practice meditation and/or hypnosis. You must forgive yourself and your parents. Let go of the past and take care of today-now.

I haven’t discussed medications because I am not an MD, but if you feel you need medical help, then by all means seek out a trained specialist. In my case, I relied on God, meditation and self hypnosis to keep my emotions and stress under control. However, I would consider medication if I was unable to control my mental and emotional state. Even so, I would always practice hypnosis and prayer as well. Whatever means you use, you must take care of this part of your life.

My main point is that you must tend to your body, mind and soul and you should never hesitate to seek help from a variety of sources.

I utilized all these steps, except for medication. If you need any advice or help, please feel free to contact me or comment. I am trained hypnotherapist and have spent the last 20 years helping others live a worthwhile life.

Kind regards,

Butch

May 21, 2009 at 11:55 pm Leave a comment

Hypnosis for teenagers-a powerful tool

I use hypnotherapy with our own high school teenager

Continue Reading February 28, 2009 at 2:55 am Leave a comment

Hypnosis, meditation or getting high-what’s the difference?

Hypnotherapy seeks to alleviate pain and improve performance.

Continue Reading February 24, 2009 at 9:50 pm 1 comment

Are things really so bad? A little perspective and hypnotherapy can help

 

Are we living in an era of extremes?  Does it seem that history used to evolve  in a predictable and uneventful line? Of course there were the occasional bumps in the road, such as a little inflation, a minor recession or the overthrow of a petty island despot?

We landed on the moon, defeated communism, doors were unlocked, kids played outside, priests were priests and High School kids smoked a little pot, but didn’t slaughter one another.  Folks worked until retirement at the same company, no one thought about health costs and milk was delivered to your door. Life was different then. Or was it?

 My 14 year old son has lived through 9/11, Iraq, Afghanistan,  beheadings broadcast on the Internet, the Internet, the worst economy since the depression, Katrina, the 2004 Tsunami, Columbine, Driveby shootings, global warming, GM failing, China ascending, ad infinitum.

Does it seem to you that world history is quickening?  That events are approaching the apocalyptic. The heroic outcome of Apollo 13 is now replaced with 2 Space shuttles exploding in the air.  Babe Ruth is succeeded by Barry Bonds. Washington and Lincoln versus Nixon and Clinton .  Are we the Mayans witnessing the end or Romans watching the Visigoths sack the eternal city?  It seems we  now accept things once thought unthinkable as normal.

But is this true? How do we compare the human nightmare of the Holocaust to 9/11? On a purely mathematical comparison of loss of life, WWII is the ultimate horror show. Can we compare the absolute poverty of the great depression to today? I suppose when we see Wall Street tycoons selling apples and cities filled with homeless mothers begging for food  then we can compare eras. The human tragedy train is always in motion. Sometimes the train chugs headlong into a random confluence of circumstances causing unimaginable tragedy. Other times the train takes a small detour causing inconvenience. It all seems so fickle and unpredictable.  Some ascribe it to cycles, fate, destiny, blind chance and butterfly wings fluttering in the wind. Things could be worse and or better.  The universe inexorably grinds on.

When I think about it, during my life I’ve witnessed the assassinations of Kennedy, King and Lennon, the Cuban Missile crises, Vietnam, Watergate, Pol Pot, Manson and Jonestown. Previous generations experienced Slavery, The Black Death, The Inquisition, Antietam, The Somme, Auschwitz and Hiroshima. Are things so different now?  I don’t think so. Rather,  it is our perception and relatively short life span that  tricks us into thinking history is unique and new to each generation. 

We humans measure life in mere decades. A generation is about 25 years. Our collective memories are individual memories writ large. This myopic perspective applies to society at large.  Reading  history can only cast a faint shadow of actually experiencing an event.  To put it simply, most of us only feel what happens personally to us. We intellectually empathise with others, but it’s what happens to you that has a visceral impact. The rest is news and words.  We’re probably hard wired this way.  Otherwise we’d be a collective basket case. 

We think we worry and fret about the world at large when actually we’re afraid of the personal impact of events.  Mass layoffs, foreclosures, crippingly debt and illness are important when they touch you . We need to put it all into perspective.  If a 4,000 year old Bristle cone Pine tree could talk, I suspect it would shrug at recent events as just another unfortunate train wreck. Or a 65 million old rock would laugh at recent human calamities as trifles compared to the asteroid or comet that wiped out the dinosaurs.

So what does all this mean to your personal life? Simply put, nothing is as bad or as good as it seems. How we perceive and react to events is what makes them horrific or bearable.

Humanity has used many ways to alleviate emotional pain;  meditation, drugs, alcohol, sex and spirituality to name a few. Hypnosis is another. I personally believe that  hypnotherapy is a scientific application of the meditative state. We have discovered that the use of specific words and sentences applied during the hypnotic state is extremely effective at reducing stress, worry and crippingly anxiety. I use it daily to cope with life’s ups and downs. It works. I can teach you how to use it.

So if life, the economy or the prospect of another asteroid hitting earth worries you, contact me. But in the meantime, I suggest you forget the Dow Jones and the nightly news and spend more time enjoying your health, family and friends.

Yours

Butch

February 18, 2009 at 1:10 am Leave a comment

Stress relief in 3 easy steps with Hypnosis

Hypnosis is one of the easiest methods to get relief from the grind of daily stress and anxiety.

Continue Reading February 8, 2009 at 6:57 pm 1 comment

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